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支招托福作文 | 学术讨论范文(49)

作者: 2025-07-15 18:10 来源:苏州编辑
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Question

ETS样题第18题学术讨论范文

Your professor is teaching a class on child development. Write a post responding to the professor’s question.

In your response, you should do the following.

• Express and support your opinion.

• Make a contribution to the discussion in your own words.

An effective response will contain at least 100 words.

 

Doctor Diaz

We’ve been discussing ways that parents can help prepare their teenage children for adulthood. One line of thinking is that parents should encourage their teenagers to take part-time jobs to help them learn to be responsible, even if it is not an economic necessity for the teenagers to work. What are your thoughts on the issue? Should parents urge teenage children to get a job? Why or why not?

Claire

Teenagers should work part-time. When I was 16, I washed dishes at a restaurant, and I’m glad I did. I learned a lot about time management. I had to use my free time wisely to make sure I could complete homework despite spending time working at a job. This is a valuable life skill.

Andrew

I would have to disagree. A teenager is still just a kid, and in my opinion, a kid needs to focus on going to school and learning. A job would be an unnecessary distraction. If it’s all about learning responsibility, I think there are a lot of other ways to do that without the commitment required by a job.

 

范文正文

I believe that teenagers should not be encouraged by their parents to take on part-time jobs. The main reason is that, given their heavy academic workload and limited time and energy, it can be grueling and distracting for them to juggle both work and studies.【表语从句+插入结构+it形式主语】Imagine a teenager who works part-time at a local fast-food restaurant.【限制性定语从句】After a long day filled with classes, sports, and club activities, the wearyteenager drags himself to work at 5 p.m. and quickly changes into his uniform. With only a 15-minute dinner break, he has to take orders, prepare food and beverages, maintain cleanliness throughout the shift, and check equipment before closing at 10 p.m. After commuting home for half an hour, he still needs to finish his homework, which often keeps him up until midnight.【非限制性定语从句】The next morning, the teenager gets up at 6 a.m., struggling to concentrate in class and remain engaged due to insufficient sleep.【现在分词短语】Over time, this routine could lead to serious consequences such as increased absenteeism and declining academic performance. To conclude, parents should avoid persuading teenagers to take part-time jobs, as it may negatively affect their health, studies, and overall well-being.【原因状语从句】

 

写作思路和特色:

这道题是托福学术讨论写作ETS样题第18题。在这道表明立场类题目中,教授提问:父母是否应该鼓励青少年去做兼职,以帮助他们学会负责任?Claire认为应该,因为她通过做兼职学到了很多时间管理方面的知识,这是一项宝贵的生活技能;而Andrew则认为不应该,他觉得青少年应该专注于学业,兼职只会带来不必要的干扰。

这篇文章采用了“个人观点+因果论证+举例论证+总结”的写作结构,明确表达了反对家长鼓励青少年做兼职的观点。首先,文章提出核心立场:由于青少年学业负担重、时间和精力有限,做兼职不仅辛苦,还会分散学习注意力。接着,文章通过一个具体案例来详细说明观点:一名青少年白天上课、参加运动和社团活动后,疲惫地在下午五点去快餐店兼职,只能匆匆吃十五分钟晚餐,随后完成点餐、备餐、清洁和设备检查等任务,直到晚上十点下班,再花半小时回家后还要熬夜做作业,常常要到半夜十二点才能睡觉。第二天早上六点又要早起去上学,因为睡眠不足而难以集中注意力,导致课堂表现下降。久而久之,这种高强度的生活方式可能会引发旷课率上升、学习成绩下滑等问题。最后,文章总结强调,家长不应劝说孩子去兼职,因为这可能对青少年的健康、学业乃至整体幸福感造成负面影响。

文章结构清晰,先提出观点、表明理由,再用生动详细的例子具体论证,最后重申立场,逻辑上层层递进,条理分明,论证充分有力;语言表达方面用词准确,情景描写细致,容易引发共鸣。

 

用词用语整理:

【表语从句+插入结构+it形式主语】

“The main reason is that, given their heavy academic workload and limited time and energy, it can be grueling and distracting for them to juggle both work and studies.” 这句话作为文章的因果论证,明确指出青少年因学业繁重、时间和精力有限而无法兼顾兼职与学习,从而为后续举例论证奠定基础。其中,表语从句清晰交代主要原因,插入的分词结构增加背景条件,it形式主语则可以让句子更加自然、流畅,尤其是把较长的不定式短语放在后面,避免句子头重脚轻。

【现在分词短语】

“The next morning, the teenager gets up at 6 a.m., struggling to concentrate in class and remain engaged due to insufficient sleep.” 这句话在文章中具体展现了兼职对青少年睡眠和课堂表现的负面影响,进一步加强文章论点的说服力。其中,现在分词短语“struggling to...”表示伴随状态或结果,细化了青少年兼职后第二天上课时的具体状态,突出了因为睡眠不足导致的持续性影响,既丰富了细节,也增强了文章的表现力和说服力。

【原因状语从句】

“To conclude, parents should avoid persuading teenagers to take part-time jobs, as it may negatively affect their health, studies, and overall well-being.” 这句话在文章中起到总结和重申中心论点的作用,再次明确强调兼职对青少年的负面影响,从而有力收束全文。其中,由连词as引导的原因状语从句通过明确说明提出建议的理由,加强了句子逻辑和说服力,既呼应了前文的细节论证,也有助于在结尾处有效地巩固文章主旨。

academic(学业的,学术的):指与学校、大学或研究机构里的学习、课程、成绩和研究有关的,强调正规教育和学术性,可以与subjects, performance, research, conference, knowledge等做搭配,表示学科课程、学业表现、学术研究、学术会议、学术知识等。在托福写作中,使用academic一词比单纯使用study或learning更好,尤其在学术写作中显得更专业、更准确。在文章中academic workload用来强调青少年主要任务是学习,突出学业负担之重,从而为反对兼职提供有力的理由支持。

例句:

She has excellent academic results and hopes to study medicine at university.

她的学业成绩非常优·秀,希望能在大学里学习医学。

grueling(非常累人的,使人筋疲力尽的):形容词,通常用来形容体力或精神上都很消耗的任务、行程或比赛,强调过程非常艰苦、让人感到精疲力竭。在文章中用来形容兼职的辛苦和消耗,强化青少年难以同时兼顾学习与工作的论点,使观点更具说服力。

例句:

After a grueling 12-hour hike, we finally reached the mountain summit.

经过一段让人筋疲力尽的 12 小时徒步后,我们终于到达了山顶。

distracting(令人分心的,分散注意力的):形容词,通常用来修饰事物(人、声音、环境等),表达这个事物让人无法专心。在文章中用来强调兼职会分散青少年对学习的注意力,突出其对学业产生负面影响的主要原因。

例句:

Listening to loud music while studying can be very distracting.

在学习时听大声音乐会让人很分心。

juggle(同时应付):juggle最基本的意思是抛接球等物品,即表演时把几个物品连续抛向空中并用手接住;文章取其引申义,即同时处理多项任务,应付很多事情,比如同时兼顾工作、家庭、学习等。这是现代语境中很常用的意思,尤其在讨论时间管理或多重责任时。在文章中形象地描述了青少年在学业和兼职之间艰难平衡的状态,强调两者兼顾的挑战性。

例句:

Many parents have to juggle their jobs and taking care of their children.

很多父母需要同时兼顾工作和照顾孩子。

weary(疲倦的,筋疲力尽的):形容词,可以用来形容身体上的疲劳,也可以形容心理上的厌倦,在文章中用来描绘青少年因学业和兼职双重压力而感到疲惫;weary也可以当动词,固定搭配是weary of,意思是使疲惫,对……感到厌烦。

例句:

After a long day of meetings, she felt completely weary and just wanted to go home.

在经历了一整天的会议后,她感到筋疲力尽,只想回家。

commuting(通勤):commuting来自动词commute,意思是通勤,即每天往返于家和工作或学校之间,常用于表示一种日常习惯性的、重复性的往返移动。在文章中具体描写青少年上下班途中所花费的额外时间,进一步凸显兼职对其时间和精力的消耗,加深论证力度。

例句:

Many people spend hours commuting every day, which can be exhausting and reduce their free time.

许多人每天花好几个小时通勤,这会让人非常疲惫,还会减少他们的自由时间。

insufficient(不够的,不足的):形容词,用来描述数量、程度或质量不够,不能满足需求或要求。常和名词搭配,如insufficient time(时间不足), insufficient evidence(证据不足), insufficient funds(资金不足),以及文章中的insufficient sleep(因兼职导致的睡眠不足),一般用于正式或学术场合,比单纯表达not enough更正式。

例句:

Many students fail the exam because of insufficient preparation.

很多学生因为准备不足而考试不及格。

absenteeism(旷课,旷工):通常用于描述指上学或上班时因为懒散、缺乏责任感或其他个人原因而反复不来上学、上班的经常性缺席现象,而不是指偶尔请假。在文章中具体指出兼职可能导致青少年旷课率上升,体现兼职对学业负面影响的严重性,进一步增强论证说服力。

例句:

High rates of absenteeism can seriously affect a company’s productivity.

高缺勤率会严重影响公司的生产力。

well-being(幸福,安康):名词,表示一个人或群体在身体、心理、社会等方面整体良好的状态。在文章中用来强调兼职对青少年整体身心健康和幸福感的潜在负面影响,深化论点的广泛性和重要性。

例句:

Exercise is essential for our physical and mental well-being.

锻炼对我们的身体健康和心理健康都至关重要。

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